Tuesday, 14 January 2014

Dear Steve

Dear Steve Anderson of Cumbria (@womblekicking),

Can we have a word? In the last 8 months, you have reported me to:

  • Two newspaper editors
  • Three national Police forces
  • Interpol
  • Three Members of Parliament
  • The RSPCA

  • You have issued death threats against my wife, my six children and me.
  • You have threatened to kill my work colleagues and burn down my home and office
  • You have reported me for being a Paedophile (I’m not)
  • You have reported me for being a wife beater (I’m not)
  • You have reported me for hitting my children (I don’t)
  • You have reported me for animal cruelty (I don’t)
  • You have threatened my clients
  • You have threatened my wife's employers
  • You have reported me to Denise Bulger (mother of murdered Jamie Bulger) for using the word “Bulgar” to describe the Bulgarian people.
  • You are now accusing me of criminal “harassment”

All because, in my role as a paid Internet Satirist and commentator, you decided to take offence at a joke.

Print this letter, take it to your local GP and ask nicely if he can help you. Whatever you are seeking, I do not have the answer.

Best of luck,

Old Holborn

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