Thursday, 14 January 2010
The Tories will change the nanny state...
...for the worse.
The Tory health spokesman, Andy Landy, has decided he wants to change the 'units' on booze to 'centilitres (10 ml) of pure alcohol' because he thinks we are 'all confused by units'.
The plan drew protests from alcohol experts last night, who pointed out that using 'centilitres of pure alcohol' would confuse most drinkers.
Put whatever you want on there. Most of us don't read them at all and those who do, only do so because they're competing to see who can drink the most and you're giving them a handy way to keep score. It doesn't matter what the units are defined as, as long as they can be added up on a scorecard. And you silly sods still don't realise that, do you?
Harmless bit of political stupidity, really. Like putting a coal miner's lung or a set of juvenile sweet-rotted teeth on cigarette packs. Stick what you want on the packs and the bottles. We really don't care. You can stick a photo of Bernard Manning on every pack of burgers and they'll sell just the same. If you really want to stop the sale of something, write 'Government approved' on it.
This is, unfortunately, merely the tip of the heavily submerged Tory nanny-monster that will come to the surface as soon as Smooth Forehead replaces Crinkly Face in number ten. For the Tory nannying machine is only just firing up.
The row eclipsed the unveiling of the party's public health strategy, which was pitched as a war on binge Britain.
They aren't even in power yet and they have declared war on their own people. Not going well, Dave, not well at all.
Mr Lansley confirmed plans to increase taxes on super-strength drinks and said he would if necessary introduce legislation to ban cut-price supermarket deals on alcohol.
The Tories will set State approved pricing structures on private businesses. Are you sure your name is Cameron, Dave? Are you sure it's not Stalin?
He pledged to toughen up the licensing regime to make it easier to close down noisy or irresponsible bars and clubs.
Noisy bars? Where? Nobody will be allowed more than five units a month by the time you've finished. Those bars aren't likely to be noisy. They're more likely to be sullen. And empty. And closed. Good way to support small businesses, Mr. Alleged Tory.
But he rejected calls from the chief medical officer and the Commons health select committee to set a minimum price on all alcohol - claiming it would penalise moderate drinkers.
Oh, a spark of light in the man's brain at last. For now. We all know those medicos love to get their way and they'll make up any old number to do it. This policy will change. Not before the election, mind. The day after.
Mr Lansley's public health strategy also contained plans to tackle obesity by working with fast-food restaurants and bars to publicise calorie contents of their meals, and to reduce the sizes of portions.
The Tories will dictate portion sizes and recipes to private businesses. I have to ask about that name again, Dave. There's also the 'calorie content'. Who remembers when tobacco products had to display 'tar content'? Do you recall where that innocent little label led?
He said he wanted food packaging to show daily guideline amounts of fat, sugar and salt, and called for further restrictions on the marketing of unhealthy foods to children.
The Tories will dictate what food you and your children can and cannot buy. Certain foods will be age restricted and you will have to show ID to get them. You will not be able to buy them when your child is with you in case you're buying them for an under-age Mars bar muncher. They will have guideline daily amounts of food components. Like they now have guideline daily amounts of alcohol. Daily amounts they are to legislate to enforce. See where it's going? It's going in the same direction it always goes. Total control. For no reason other than total control.
There is absolutely nothing Tory in any of this. Where is the 'personal responsibility'? Where is the 'supporting small businesses'? This is pure far-left Brownian extreme socialism. If you vote Tory you might as well vote Labour because this manifesto is exactly the damn same. Whichever one of them gets in, it will make absolutely no difference to the rapid erosion of every right anyone in the country ever held. We will march ever onwards to a country in which every waking act is directed by the State and deviation will be punished.
Now come on, Davidovitch Stalin, you've been rumbled. When did you change your name to Cameron? Your party is about as Tory as Chairman Mao's. Your policies must be making the Brown Gorgon laugh harder than Mandelson's French Tickler. You are proposing things he hasn't managed to get away with himself yet.
The big story for the papers is none of the control freakery above. It's whether boozers should keep score in units or millilitres. That's the big issue here because...
One unit of alcohol is defined as one centilitre of pure alcohol anyway - so all that would change is the name.
Sigh. What's the point? The boozers won't even have to print new scorecards.
They're not finished yet:
Andrew Lansley yesterday promised 'a substantial sum of money' for the best suggestions on ways to tackle obesity, binge drinking, teenage pregnancy and other social problems.
Not content with all the controls they already plan, they want ideas for more. And they'll pay the Righteous for them. With our taxes. Once more, we'll all be paying people to order us around and abuse us if we don't comply with their idea of how we should live our lives.
Don't vote Tory. Please.
Vote Libertarian or UKIP or Independent or anything but don't vote Tory, Labour or Lib Dem.
They all have to go. There is no other way out of this.