Saturday, 2 January 2010

Blind them with Science

Automatic Number Plate Recognition systems record the movements of over 10 million UK citizens every day by reading the number plate on your car and storing the location in a database.

In an effort to help the authorities in this vital work of knowing exactly where we are and where we have been every single fucking minute of the bastard day, may I suggest that you illuminate your number plates with a small infrared lightbulb available for 50p on the internet.

APNR Cameras work on infrared light, not normal daylight. So make your number plate really, really, really bright.

Caution. If the bulb is too bright in the infrared spectrum, say 940 nm, the camera will not be able to read it. It will be like taking a picture of the sun through a telephoto lens. Even though it is completely invisible to the naked eye, of course. Night or day.

More friendly tips later.


Anonymous said...

Do "Freemen" pwn vehicles - if so they need impounding and crushing immediately!

Anonymous said...

Holbers drives a Skoda. Or did until he left it on the beach at Maldon or somewhere and the tide came in.

Am sure Robert will post us a pic - will save me posting a link.

Back to ANPR - any tips on how to actually illuminate a number plate with one of those wonderful bulbs then??

AP said...

Pointless, even if you do fit a lighting rig to your front bumper you will need about 500 of these bulbs to light the plate up to a degree that the camera can't cope with. It has automatic metering for one, and secondly even if you could outdazzle sunlight the data can be recovered digitally even if the picture is significantly over exposed by five stops or more.

It is easier to find (a freeman preferably as he won't be paying any fines anyway) who has a similar car and clone his plates.

Capt.Bill said...

AS a freeman you would illuminate it (not in a masonic way) by running a cable from your silver space helmet using the "comp-drone" facility.

Anonymous said...

This blog is starting to border on the INSANE and inept

caesars wife said...

expensive experiment if poster AP is right , besides arnt these cameras mostly on motorways and congestion charge zone . Still useless against determined criminal though.

Anonymous said...

BTW: I've just seen Elvis, serving fries in Burger King, Sun Street Passage, City of London.

Is there a Masonic connection?

Chris said...

You crap muncher.

These LEDs are for homemade remote controls and, er robots. This is your kind of thing!

Keep it real - don't lose the plot! Get yourself a pre-1973 motor car - a V Beetle - tax-exempt and you'll find that you won't be greeted by the ANPR cameras in the local supermarkets.

gobshite said...

Can you get one that says 'suck my balls' in infrared light?

EarthVehice-1 said...

Greeting Earthlingoids & O.H

We are monitoring this blog, and have noticed an increase in Bullshit being transmitted to the Tharg region of Septimus-9.

Anonymous said...

Write whatever obscenity you like on a piece of cardboard and sellotape it over your number plate.

Highly unlikely you'll ever get pulled by Plod - after all, when was the last time you saw one? and should you do, feign ignorance and claim to be the victim of someone elses' mischief.

Or........pull on your Freedom Warden Hi-Vis coat, claim you're a freeman and get a good kicking as they cart you off to Braintree Nick.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Sir George of Formby Lancs said...

Turned out nice again!

Anonymous said...

As a freeman, you can slap a "NO CONTRACT" self adhesive label on any fines.

Better still take off you TAX plates cos you aint paying any.

Problemo solved!

Shithole Britain said...

I can't see it working, OH. So far as I'm aware, the cameras work off normal,visible light. Else why the visible flash? IR is used for thermal imaging which is totally inappropriate for this purpose. Someone's been having you on, mate.

watching said...

If 'caught' misbehaving by staying parked on a supermarket car park or similar by the parky cameras and the legal scammers behind the lens send you an INVOICE by all means read it but never ever reply to it.
If the supermarket/diy shed/retail park car park is FREE to park on no matter how long a vehicle sporting government authorised DVLA licence plates is parked there you don't have to pay parky anything ever.
The DVLA is the government company which extorts £2.50 from parky to get the details of the 'REGISTERED KEEPER' of the authorised official REGISTRATION number which includes the details of the vehicle they are attached to.
As you have complied with the LAW and registered your vehicle in the normal fashion your name and address will also be supplied to parky.

This makes a total mockery of data protection as ANYONE can set themselves up as a parking enforcement company and can then get the details of every single set of licence plates on every single vehicle that parks for free on the patch of land you enforce parking restrictions on!

Anonymous said...

This freeman business is really nuthink new anyway. Others have been doing the same thing for decades. It commonly involves a fair bit of travelling, though. You would do well to get some tips from the PTs who've got this malarky down to a fine art. Here's a handy intro:

Maybe some day you'll join us.

watching said...

You can safely ignore any correspondence from parky as all they will ever be able to prove is that the licence plates were on a said bit of land for a certain amount of time on a particular day.
They cannot prove they were actually attached to the vehicle whose details they bought from the DVLA.
They cannot prove that you or anyone else was the driver even though the DVLA details will reveal the personal address details of the registered keeper!

Ignore them and after an interesting few weeks of letters that come first from parky and then parky's 'solicitors' (they aren't actually solicitors and are just a 'legal company' whatever one of them is) they give up and go away.
In my case the original fine for staying 20 minutes longer than parky's signs allowed me too was £90 which they would graciously reduce to £45 if I paid up within 14 days.
This first invoice looks for all the world like it's DVLA official. Quite how they get away with this is easy to understand when you find out just how much the DVLA makes from handing over your details to these companies. Can't recall the exact figures but it is a huge sum.
The next four invoices all looked the same as the first except for a 'DO NOT IGNORE THIS LETTER' warning in bright red letters on them and the amount they claimed I owed them quickly rose to £195.

The next three letters (invoices) came from the legal company, allegedly. They were the same paper (sad I know but there are ways to find this simple fact out) they were pre-printed just like the parky invoices although they were brown where parky's were blue and had a different pre-printed font although all of the details parky had garnered from the DVLA and ostensibly handed over again to the legal company in another clear breach of data protection, which is woefully inadequate piece of shit nulabour legislation, except they hadn't as the parky invoice and the legal company letters were printed in the same font and the parky company and the legal company either share the same offices or are in fact one and the same entity.

Still the legal company letters (invoices) are funny as they threaten to 'take you to court' if you don't pay immediately. Having been through the County Court system myself on occasion and won, I know their procedures well and the court is the body that informs you you are going to be taken to the County Court not a legal company.

After the three legal company letters parky tried one last time and this time dropped the 'fine' back to its original level of £90 as 'a gesture of goodwill'. I ignored this and then they went away to fleece another ignorant sod.

If you reply you give them tacit agreement that you were behind the wheel of the vehicle sporting the DVLA plates. Better to ignore them. You are not being dishonourable as they are starting from a position of dishonour.

Long post but if it prevents one person from handing over their hard earned to these legalised thieves (they are doing nothing illegal but everything they do is unlawful which is how I came to realise all is not what it seems in the world of legalities or what I now understand to be either fleet or company law) it will have been worth the twenty minutes of two fingered typing it has taken me to write the bloody thing out.

It is equally possible to get out of paying fines on council owned or privately run car parks where you pay to park but as I never ever use them I am unable to advise. The process is very similar but you have to do things in a slightly different way because money changes hands.

Vladimir said...

The ANPR cameras could use infrared which is quite commonly used for CCTV. Sometimes at night, around secure buildings, you may see CCTV cameras with dim red lights next to them. These are, in fact, extremely bright infrared lights. The cameras produce black and white pictures.

Thermal imaging is also infrared, but that's far infrared, rather than near. There are many shades of infrared light. The far sort is radiated by hot objects and not very useful for taking detailed pictures. The near sort is similar to visible light.

However, I think the ANPR systems do use visible light. When they are used in the dark areas of motorways, you normally find that large floodlights have been set up near to them, blasting bright white light across all the motorway lanes. If they were infrared, why not use infrared or sodium lights? The picture attached to this blog post seems to corroborate that, because it's clearly a visible light picture (it's in colour).

Personally I think you want a James Bond-style rotating number plate...

microdave said...

Even if these would fool the ANPR cameras, you can't just wire them up to a 12/24 volt battery. If you did they would be incredibly bright, but only for a split second...

They need voltage & current limiting.

Anonymous said...

So, in essence, the OP is all bullshit then?

Plus ca change and all that.

If you see a loon in a Hi-Vis Jacket, Guy Fawkes Mask driving a Skoda with a rusty plimsoll line up just under the windows and lit up like a fucking Christmas tree going the wrong way down Braintree High Street, we'll know who it is then.

WV: carfer. Ha ha ha As in Carfer Holby??

Ron Broxted said...

I am really pleased to see the beautiful and highly trained Cressida Dick from Scotland Yard getting a gong for the death of the over staying illegal immigrant Mendez. If more of these overstaying illegals were topped instead of being given thousands in benefits there would not be such a problem. On the subject of vehicles movements being store on a central computer, I cannot drive and cannot afford a car anyway, but I have filed the frame number off a bike I stole six months ago, so let them try and track my movements between public lavatories, swing parks and other open spaces.

Mitch said...

read about the buggers bragging about em and guess who it is eh ? ED fukin S again, bunch of nulab cocksniffers.

Mitch said...

The Application of Infrared Illumination to ANPR

If a standard colour or monochrome camera was focused to read number plates it would have to contend with a huge variety of lighting conditions, daytime, night-time, sunlight, backlight, headlights, and so on. One configuration simply would not cope with all conditions, so there is a need to provide a constant level and direction of illumination irrespective of any other conditions. And so we come to the development of special cameras for continuous capture of number plate data.

The camera must be sensitive to the infrared part of the spectrum, to at least 850 nanometres. Then it must be fitted with a filter to restrict the visible part of the spectrum. The lens would have a manual iris set fully open and the shutter speed set to 1/1000th second. Finally an infrared source must be fitted adjacent to the camera.

Therefore, taking advantage of the retro-reflective characteristics of number plates, the illumination from the illuminator will be reflected directly back to the camera. Thus only infrared light will be seen without any visible light or other reflections or refractions. The picture will of course be black with no detail except for the number plate. The OCR software then takes care of converting the image to usable code.

Note that this is the sort of image on the monitor both day and night.

see tosspot they do use IR.

Peeps poet said...

Skoda man,
doin wot ya can
in ya hi-tech van.
Loose on the BrainTree!

Anonymous said...

I thoguht OH lived in France, had a business in Swizerland, now it turns out its all part of his persona BS.
A rusty Skoda? Braintree?

Exposed living on the dole in a council flat next!

Rogerborg said...

@Anonymous: >This blog is starting to border on the INSANE and inept

What utter bullshit. "starting"? It crossed that line a loooooong time ago.

Now we're using Invisible Light to protect ourselves from the people that are out to get us? I can't decide whether this blog is prepping the ground for an insanity plea, or whether it's producing material for a complete series of Mythbusters.

Anonymous said...

Microdave said: Even if these would fool the ANPR cameras, you can't just wire them up to a 12/24 volt battery. If you did they would be incredibly bright, but only for a split second...

They need voltage & current limiting.

Dave it's really piss easy. They only require current limiting in practice; a single resistor in series with the diode does the trick and costs all of about 5p from the local Maplin shop.

Old Holborn said...

Some excellent window licking going on from the usual anons tonight.

Cheers guys, great work

I Watch said...

In the blogging world where nearly everybody is operating under some sort of cover, one has to always bear in mind that the person expressing their statements may be working to a purpose not revealed in the words they choose to use. We are all aware of the concept of psy ops, false flag operations, dissemination agencies and rebuttal units, that are routinely employed by those that seek to retain control by sidelining the opposition. Two or more such actions, sometimes seemingly working against each other, can in fact dominate the agenda and manipulate the focus of attention away from, or toward, the desired aims of the instigators.
It's a duplicitous and deceitful world out there people.

Anonymous said...

OH, you might want to check out the many and various Anarchist Cookbooks that are now available online. They have some tips that cover the whole subject of fucking the system up from the sublime to the ridiculous. Some of the advice is fucking hilarious, too.

Anonymous said...

I always had trouble remembering my Number plate so I changed my name by deed poll to LV04FGT. Simples

bofl said...

speed cameras are just another way to milk us........i dont drive like a loony...i have a clean license....but it is easy to creep a few mph over the limit.

speed does not mean accidents.i lived in germany for a while.most autobahns are 2 lanes...many with no speed limit.i had a sports car and often drove at very fast speeds.......

oddly there were NOT hundreds of crashed cars everywhere........

(of course they do have speed limits in towns-a colleague got nicked for doing 8km ph in a dorf )!

but it is part of an industry...a job creation put more signs here/barriers there/survey the site/health n safety......

and also a way to make us into pliable robots.........

of couldnt happen here!

Old Holborn said...

There seems to be some confusion between CCTV, speed cameras and ANPR

This is an anti ANPR system

Anonymous said...

O.H from G.O.T site.

Islam4UK, a platform for the global front Al-Muhajiroun, would like to announce the launch of a momentous march that is scheduled to take place in the following weeks, details of which will be released shortly inshaa'allah (God willing).

The destination of this very special event is the small market town of Wootton Bassett, located 6 miles Southwest of Swindon, in northern Wiltshire; Wootton Bassett, is currently famous for its public mourning processions held in memory of British soldiers killed whilst on military service in Afghanistan; coffins containing the dismembered bodies of these soldiers are usually draped in union jack flags and driven through the town centre from RAF Lyneham, as a tribute to their ‘sacrifice'.

The proposed march by members of Islam4UK is however of a very different venture, held not in memory of the occupying and merciless British military, but rather the real war dead who have been shunned by the Western media and general public as they were and continue to be horrifically murdered in the name of Democracy and Freedom - the innocent Muslim men, women and children.

It is quite extraordinary, that with well over 100,000 Muslims killed in Afghanistan in the last 8 years that those military serviceman who have directly or indirectly contributed to their death are paraded as war heroes and moreover honoured for what is ultimately genocide.

We at Islam4UK find this totally unacceptable and as a result have decided to launch the ‘Wootton Bassett March' to highlight the real casualties of this brutal Crusade.

If you would like more information about the ‘Wootton Bassett March' or are Muslim and would like to take part in it please contact the following numbers:

Edgar said...

One thing is not recommended. When one of these vile, thieving private organisations sends a demand for money, do not, repeat DO NOT, reply by means of a small parcel that either ticks or has the odd loose wire or two protruding through the packaging.

Well, .... maybe just one, then.

watching said...

worth a read cursory or in-depth it's up to you!

Anonymous II said...

940nm? No, you would need 850nm IR LEDS. Plus to screw up the OCR, you wouldn't need to flood light the whole plate, just a few narrow angle leds, illuminating stripes across the lettering should do the job quite nicely.

eris said...

You might also like:

'The brand new, patented PhotoBlocker spray STOPS you from getting caught by speed cameras -- by automatically REFLECTING the light of the camera flash, like a mirror.The reflected light overexposes the image, making your number plate ABSOLUTELY UNREADABLE.'

Not that I've tried it myself yet.

remici said...

Epic fail.

Still a prat.

SO17 said...

A cheap and effective numberplate fix with a plausable excuse.
Use a garden hose on a fine spray with an attached feeder bottle filled with mud.Lovely.
Takes the elbow grease out of cleaning the fucking car and the Kids wont moan about doing it either.

Ron Broxted said...

Feel really bad mood low last night I was in a rough cottage in Eaton Socon,where I was staying with my ex-lover and his new twink. Decided to go out cottaging on my own as I had blue balls watching listening to their man love. Had only been at the trough for five minutes, when a good looking black guy came in and grabbed my cock. He said he was a legal clerk and was interested in my briefs......Oooh matron,in the end he was really rough with me and shoved a bottle of Red Stripe up my ferret hole the Ras Clart.
I am such a wicked batty bwoy.
Must go another nose bleed starting.

Ron Broxted said...

Layth al Islam to march thru Wootton Bassett? Go baby go, I want to see a line of body bags for plod. Stick it to the gora. Then stick your meat stick up my wizards sleeve of a rectum.

Anonymous said...

There seems to be some confusion between CCTV, speed cameras and ANPR

This is an anti ANPR system

Fairynuff then. In that case if you need a hand working out the correct value resistors to go with your LEDs, just give us a shout.

cfjc7 said...


Thanks for your post. Perhaps you can help me with my nasty little bag of shite.

Some months ago I got an ‘Intended Notice of Prosecution’ for speeding. I called this into question (with a supporting letter) the time that they had on the notice, I believe I was not on that road at the stated time…of course I could have made a mistake and am quite willing to accept this. I have admitted to being the driver, since I was.

The fine is £60 and three penalty points on the licence. Now here is where it’s gets interesting.

About two years ago I sent my old paper licence in to DVLA to have an expired conviction expunged, but the DVLA says that it has destroyed my old licence and that I must now apply for a new photo licence, which as you know expires every three years, whereas my old paper one expires in 2020.

Why should I get a photo licence, which would expire in three years time, when my old one still has ten years to run…and all for the convenience of the police to put three points on it…I’m not going to do it.

Should not the DVLA have informed me that they would destroy my old licence, at least I could have requested its return…if I had known this, then obviously I would not have sent it in the first place.

I believe that if the court want to put penalty points on my licence, then they should get my original licence from DVLA…or wait ten years until I get a photo licence to put their points on it.

Twenty-eight days has now long gone since getting the ‘Notice of Intended Prosecution’, but I know that I will be dragged into court at some stage.

Old Holborn said...

I drive on a German licence, first issued in 1986. It lasts until I die and the UK State can't put points on it or take it away from me, even if I'm drunk.

The Germans can't take it away from me if I'm not in Germany.

Play the games. They HATE it.

Anonymous said...

A friend of mine got one of those green lasers that have been recommended here before and nearly shat himself. Those things are fucking evil. He accidentally blinded himself from a reflection over 20 feet away and couldn't see fuck all for a good 10-15 minutes. Hopefully the damage won't be long-lasting, but it's a wake-up call. If you get one of these whilst you still can, they're NOT toys, so DON'T LET YOUR KIDS ANYWHERE NEAR THEM.

Anonymous said...

Imagine that on a copper's helmet's visor with just a few scratches on it! Totally disabling!

Anonymous said...

OH, your German license lasts till you are 70 then you have to get a UK license if you are still resident.

Also cross EU application of penalties are on their way.

Nice ruse though while it lasts.

Old Holborn said...


I look forward to the German State finding a 70 year old Old Holborn to remind him. If he is still resident in the UK ( Electoral register? I'm not on it)

The games we play....

caesars wife said...

you will like mps and peers expense prosecution new get out clause OH !

AP said...

OH, AP not Anon, didn't hit the right button.

It is your insurance company that will will police that one it is one of the questions they ask, or a UK cop who stops you.

I am surprised that you are completely disengaged from the democratic process, opting to be a 'no voice' when we do get to vote. Even spoiling your vote in protest is a better protest than not even bothering to turn up.

You see to base your life on not getting caught, not paying tax in return for living here. Much like the 'scum' you regularly coruscate here.

caesars wife said...

for those of you think labour government does the right thing , see what David Milliband has done,is nothing beyond these crooks , see Peter Hitchens

graphyd said...

Shithole Britain said...

"I can't see it working, OH. So far as I'm aware, the cameras work off normal,visible light. Else why the visible flash? IR is used for thermal imaging which is totally inappropriate for this purpose. Someone's been having you on, mate."

There are many flavours of infra red devices. Thermal imaging is just one of them. Recording in low light and keen to get a high contrast image for better optical character recognition infra red would be useful. What OH would be trying to do is similar to this: Infrared LEDs make you invisible to CCTV cameras

Kirsty Young said...

I have just read Ron Broxted's blog on the Indy live journal site and I have to say its fucking dire. Broxted might be a unremitting arse bandit and wanker and ponce, along with being a fully paid up memember of 'Cunts are Us' but nobody could accuse him of being a journalist. What puzzles me is why he bothers to comment here?

Rogerborg said...

Meanwhile, back in the real world...

The onus is now on individuals to prove that a contract doesn't exist.

And you can't even do that. This is a verbatim quote:

"The absence of a copy of a signed executed agreement is no evidence that such an agreement was not made."

His other statements are rendered irrelevant by that. It's carte blanche for 'creditors' to simply put their hands on their hearts and say "The debtor signed a contract, but the dog ate it. Honest, though, he did. Pay us whatever we say we're owed."

Well, I guess that buggers your "Freeman" fantasies pretty hard, without lube or a reacharound. Actually, it buggers all of us, but you chaps most particularly. Good luck getting the Courts to buy into your delusions now.

Bugger said...

In another life I used to spend a lot of tie in Canada, Quebec and Ontario.

Ontario had a ginormous budget defeceit and resorted to "fiscalising the highway"

Every fekin copper had a radar gun and had targets to meet. They had several vans equipped with multiple cameras top catch marginal speedsters on the 401 etc around Toronto.

Then someone found a way of producing number plates, legally, with a reflective coating that shone back obscuring the number, especially as it also had the reflective effect. They were difficult to differentiate until normal lighting but the flash of the Gatso caused the effect. No use against video vans but the people phoned the Radio stations and warned them where the vultures were.

Next Provincial Election one newish party had as a central manifesto promise a return to road sanity and guess, what, they won?

End of hysterical use of speed cameras.

Counter measures might work someties but the only way is to hang the fuckers who pass the laws. That stops it for sure.

Anonymous said...

No, they can't put points on a German licence but if you get a motoring conviction they'll create a DVLA driver record for you (kind of a ghost licence) and shovel the points onto that. This is how they give points to 15yr old kids caught joyriding etc.

Anonymous said...

Well I just pointed my TV remote at my camera phone lens and the normally invisible light showed up very brightly. Maybe there's something in this ? You can get 100 of 940nm IR LED's from China for under £5 - look on E-Bay.
As a cautionary tale if the Old Bill have an ANPR van they usually have a couple of cars or motorbikes nearby to stop any vehicles of interest - I suspect that if your number plate lights up like an infra red christmas tree this may well be like the proverbial red rag to a bull.

strongholdbarricades said...

So how do you know when the method works?

No point in annoying the legalised stasi if you don't get the payback

rogerBorg said...

rogerborg is a wanker

Anonymous said...

I've just done the same thing with my digital SLR and a known-to-be-working remote and got FUCK ALL. Not even a glimmer!

banned said...

watching 18:01 Good advice, bit like the telly rax really, though actually the breach of data security is somewhat worse. For a flat fee of not many thousands of pounds these car park companies can get access to the entire DVLA Database.
My preferred way of confusing their somputer is to always leave town on a main raod but sneak back into the suburbs via a country lane. They always see me go but never see me come back.

graphyd said...

Anonymous 1317,

Most digital SLRs have very good IR blocking filters on them that a camera phone might not. The filters are that good it buggers things up for people wanting to take infra red pictures and they get the filter removed.

Anonymous said...

Well I'll be jiggered, graphyd!

Road_Hog said...

A bit late commenting on this one, but pieces of information. First you don't need to be a regsitered parking company to get vehicle licence details. Any member of the public can get them with this form. To complete section 4 & 5, just write, owner details as car is parked on my land, to issue a summons. As for the ANPR cameras, I must hold my hands up and take some responsibility for helping the implementation of these. Almost 10 years ago plod was purchasing 43 of the mobile camera vans that you see (one for each metropolitan area) and they needed a power source for the equipment. I was involved alog with the dealer in recommending and supplying the generators for these. My point however is, that quite often these vans will have a police motorcyclist further down the road to catch unregistered vehicles or where it doesn't show up properly on their database. So whilst you maybe okay with fixed cameras you might come a cropper with a mobile van.

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