Wednesday, 21 October 2009

Nelson's Column. Ins'Allah


Nelsons Column is currently an 18ft pillar with a statue of Admiral Horatio Nelson situated at the top, resting above bronze acanthus leaves.

Under the Shari'ah, the construction and elevation of statues or idols is prohibited, and consequently, the statue of Admiral Horatio Nelson would be removed and demolished without hesitation (click on picture to enlarge).



Indeed, there is none truly worthy of worship except Allah (SWT) and thus the veneration of any man or woman is unacceptable, let alone a man such as Horatio Nelson who was a notorious fornicator, as his illicit relationships with married women such as Emma, Lady Hamilton demonstrate.

Furthermore, due to the fact that the actual column is based on the architecture of the Temple of Mars Ultor, in Rome, the engravings on the column will have to be altered in favour of Islamic indentations, possibly floral designs.

Possible Replacement for Nelson Statue: Islamic Clock

On completion of the demolition of Nelson's statue and the alteration of its Corinthian engravings, we would envisage seating an exquisitely constructed Islamic clock with the black flag of Islam flying high over it (refer to picture); this clock could also be fitted with an electronic device that would sound the Islamic call to prayer 5 times a day; moreover, because the statue of Horatio Nelson is coincidentally positioned facing due south, on its replacement with an Islamic orientated clock, the front of the clock could duly be rotated 45 degrees (anti-clockwise) so as to indicate the direction of the qibla i.e. direction of the Kaabah in Makkah, thereby making it easier for Muslims in the locality to know which way to pray.




Islam4UK

I'm actually slightly dizzy from laughing

51 comments:

woman on a raft said...

Islam4UK is Anjem Choudrey's vehicle for spouting nonsense. It would be funny, if it was funny.

bofl said...

why dont they all go and live in saudi?????

stop poncing money from us too!!!

and what about them kissing the black stone?

hypocrites and hoons

Sue said...

It would be funny if these people weren't complete and utter nutters!

Tyburn Jig said...

These people are mad. They are all fucking mad.

.243 WIN said...

Beyond parody.

You can always leave a message on their site to wish the benighted fucker "Happy Trafalgar Day",

It's about time someone started applying the FIFO principal to the likes of Choudary - Fit In or Fuck Off

SO17 said...

'There will be blood' and has been but look on the bright side, when Sharia law comes in we can string Polly Toynbee up with the guts of Tony Blair and every left wing single issue pressure group will be jumped upon from a fucking great height.
Allah dont do PC baby.

I am Stan said...

Some live in fear and dread, of shadows of their own making!

Others just get on with their day!

Harri said...

Whats black, and slides down Nelsons column !

Winne Mandela...

I will get my coat on the way out.

Snowolf said...

Nelsons Column is currently an 18ft pillar

18ft? Fuck me, these Saudis must have bloody MASSIVE feet, then.

polaris said...

18ft, am I missing something???? Laugh, you've got to admire such a level of cretinitude. I was afraid, now reassured.

I am Stan said...

¨coat on way out¨

Hahahahaha nooo Harri stay have another drink...

at least someones got a sense of humour...

Billy Blofeld said...

I thought this web-site must be a piss take......... but unbelievably it is for real.

I couldn't help but wonder why they kept mentioning South West Trains (SWT) - but it turns out.........

SWT is from Arabic meaning "subhanu wa ta'ala" which translates as "Glorified and Exalted".

Bardirect said...

Today being Trafalgar Day suggests that this is a joke. Can we ask the Imam whether humour will be allowed under Sharia?

Harri said...

Time to feed the pigeons methinks !

Lots.

Guthrum said...

Actually, I think it looks rather nice !

Sue said...

It'll get covered in pigeon shit there!

Word verification "spank"... am I being punished?

Anonymous said...

These people are not mad or extremist, they are just ahead of their time.

Wait until Muslims are the majority of the UK...

lilith said...

The fountains could be used for ritual bathing...no change there then...

marc said...

Sorry, no abuse. Off topic, but does anyone know why Devils Kitchen is suddenly not accessible?

antstr said...

It's insh'allah, you multi-lingual European, you.

Anonymous said...

O/T go and petition against bliar being a president of EU if you have a mind to
http://stopblair.eu/
nearly upto the 40,000 mark

Anonymous said...

Honestly, I'd love to see them try it

Elby the Beserk said...

Over our dead bodies :-)

Marc - Google DK and the cache is still there, with an article this morning at 1:50am. Legal problem maybe? I had to remove a blog recently as a result of legal action - but I have the bastard and am going to get mediaeval on the cunt's ass. If you see what I mean :-)

Anonymous said...

You missed the best bit:

"As stated earlier the construction of idols or statues is explicitly prohibited, specifically living beings, as a result of this, the bronze lions which are situated below Nelson's Column as a symbolic ‘guard', would be removed and destroyed; the statues could also be melted and its bronze composition utilized, possibly in artillery as a defensive measure against any impending attack from outside forces, such as France."

What the fuck are they on about? Is this a joke and if so would I get my head cut off for laughing or not laughing?

Anonymous said...

Choudary seems to have declared himself Judge of the Shari'ah Court of the UK and Principal Lecturer at the London School of Shari'ah.

He's a full time activist.

Is he still on benefits despite being unavailable for work?

microdave said...

"It's about time someone started applying the FIFO principal to the likes of Choudary - Fit In or Fuck Off"

Tossers like him will NEVER fit in. He should just Fuck Off....

Joe Public said...

But that devout muslim Saddam Hussein had a number of statues of himself.

Kaygee said...

http://islam4uk.com/non-muslims/62-non-muslims/246-why-we-do-not-get-out-of-your-country

A good laugh

Rogerborg said...

It'll be interesting to see how many they get for their anti-democracy, anti-freedom march on the 31st. I'll bet you a bacon sandwich it'll be more than you get on November 5th.

I'll further bet you the brown sauce that despite having more numbers, that far fewer of them get stop-and-searched than on your little walk.

Anonymous said...

Does anyone still hold the patents and drawings for Austwich etc?


Looks like our ovens are going to be very busy burning Muslims sometime in the near future!

Old Holborn said...

Anon

Name me the last time Libertarians ever so much as sneezed at the "opposition".


If you want mega death, Socialism is the answer

Now fuck off

Anonymous said...

I notice these "enlightend* people never seem to attack anyone but the common man,
The bankers that fund all this fun (i.e. rothschilds and their ilk)
Anyone but the hand that feeds sems to be the case!

Anonymous said...

The Black Stone: teaching apes to use weapons since the Dawn of Man.

Anonymous said...

Trouble is the bastard fanatics actually mean it. Best read Melanie Philips "Londonistan to see how serious the situation has become. Currently there are apparently 14000 Pakistani "students" demanding entry into the UK. This guy may be a clown but he's a vicious little shit - and he's got plenty of support.

Jez

woman on a raft said...

Re: Devils kitchen. It seems to be technical problems. There is a message over here:

http://feeds.feedburner.com/bellagerens

The Devil’s Kitchen
Posted: Wed, 21 Oct 2009 18:41:42 +0000

A message from the Devil, whose blog has disappeared:

I’ve taken some steps to try to sort it out and I’ve also logged a call with Blogger. I hope to be back at some point this evening.

Mainly I am not dead.

DK

So you see, the rumours of his demise have been greatly exaggerated.

Anonymous said...

Let me first say that I don't live in the UK.

Where I live, I'm a foreigner, I'm treated as a foreigner, I only have the rights of a foreigner. I am NOT a local. I am and never will be treated like a local. But I stay.

I can't claim the benefits of a local, I can't vote, I can't ask the state to help me, I can't live off the locals. But I stay.

I can't take my driving test in any other language than a local. I can't speak to any department of the state in any language other than that of a local. So, I speak the local language. Not perfectly I'll admit but I speak it. I have to.

I know that I'm a second class citizen in so many ways. But I stay.

Yet here, based on MY skills, MY hard work, MY effort, even as a foreigner, I can earn more than any local. I can be a multi-millionaire and NO local will be jealous, will resent me or attack me for doing so. Even as a foreigner.

Because I do it on their terms according to their laws and traditions and in their language.

That's why I stay.

That's why you guys are fucked. You have it the wrong way round.

TheFatBigot said...

I think they need to check their spelling, why the superfluous "L" in "clock"?

thelunaticarms said...

This Islam4UK is encouraged by our Protectors to stir it up.

They want civil unrest, damn, they'll have a major war if it meant keeping power.

Islam is a tool for NuGov. What better way to end democracy than by saying we can't have "Liberal Democracy" hijacked by Islam or the evil haters of the EDL.

Next GE, vote early and vote the Old Skool Pirates out. Then stand outside the polling station and remind everyone that enters to vote anyone except the crooked stooges who have screwed us since 1945 (me personally since 1981).

We live in a banana republic, let's get rid of the banana.

Anonymous said...

Who the fuck is this Alan everyone is on a bout seems a very populat bloke?

Summer_Breeze said...

Choudery and his like should be flung out of this country. However, we know this government is too weak to deal with the problem, as someone suggested earlier, his benefits should be stopped also.

Rogerborg said...

Flung out to where? He's a British citizen.

Mind you, if I wasn't so bloody apathetic, I'd get some of these pictures of devout Muslim 'Andy' Choudary put on posters and T-shirts and join his little march.

Like all 'religious' types, he's not interested in faith, just power. Although just how dumb you'd have to be to be taken in by 'Andy' beggars belief, even by cultist standards.

Adrian Peirson said...

It's not just here that it's happening, the EU is stoking up a Europe wide civil war.
Maybe we should forget the Muslims, the head of this Beast lies in Westminster and Whitehall.

Goodbye Sweden

Labour subversive spotter said...

Hey Stan we all know you would relish living under sharia law, where you can beat your wife and stone homosexuals and oppostates to death, which going by current demographic trends will be enforced on everyone in Europe within the next 50 years.

But please at least be honest about it, eh! theres a good subversive!

Is the Labour party site missing you yet?

Anonymous said...

correction for the spelling Nazis who didn't get a comprehensive socialist education - `apostates`.

banned said...

Anon "Honestly, I'd love to see them try it"
That's what the Byzantines said about their 1,000 year old Cathedral, Sancta Sophia, till the Muslims took it over and turned it into the Hagia Sophia Mosque, complete with minarets on the corners.

islam4uk.com webmaster said...

"Database Error: Unable to connect to the database:Could not connect to MySQL"

Who's nicked my fucking website ?

Dave H said...

Please remember Mr Choudary is a qualified solictor. I'm sure he has greater powers of legal representation than any of us here.

They let anyone in these days.

Anonymous said...

Flung out to where? He's a British citizen.

Under current regulations, yes, he is a British citizen.

There are, however, many people who would dispute the current regulations. When your sole connection to this country is that your daddy moved her from Waziristan thirty years ago, your claim to the rights of citizenship are slightly tenuous.

richard said...

isn't Gordon Brown selling off Britain's assets at the moment? maybe he'll sell Nelson's column. if he sells it to the Muslims, they could, in theory, put a clock on it.
if it was up to me i'd remind these fanatics what happened to them at the great siege of Malta, where the bore of the Templars' cannons were about the same width as an Ottomam warrior's head. muslims need to be reminded, for their own good, that the phlegmatic Englishman is able to take a joke but only up to a point.

I am Stan said...

Labour subversive spotter 05:27

Obviously your paranoia is keeping you awake....get some help..

Anonymous said...

I've reported the site to http://www.iwf.org.uk/reporting.htm
It might be a laugh for others to do the same!!

ComfortablyNumb

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