Sunday, 21 June 2009

The Tin Man's Heart.

"I wonder where Damocles left his sword?"

(Picture transported by heel-click from here)

The Brown Gorgon gave his 'ordinary bloke' impression in the Guardian. It makes for teeth-grinding reading, especially since he cannot resist reminding us how he detests the Tories (we'd figured that out by now, Gorgon) and he can't help lying once more about his fantasy budget role-playing game, a game which he is losing faster than a colour-blind snooker player. So it's spin, spin, spin, even when he's trying to pretend to be real.

Something has changed though. All his playing with imaginary numbers has generated a Mandelbrot, one he now calls Lord Mandelbrot of Partly Bull and Boys, First Thingy of That Thing Over There, Diddler of the Doodah and many other names, more names than Satan himself, which should get some conspiracy theories going. Now that this Mandelbrot has inserted himself into the Gorgon's ear, the manner of the Gorgon is subtly altered. He does little dances on YouTube. He gives personal interviews. He says things like this:

"To be honest, you could walk away from all of this tomorrow," he said. "I'm not interested in what accompanies being in power. I wouldn't worry if I never returned to all those places -- Downing Street, Chequers - And it would probably be good for my children."

Which sounds like a lead-up to 'I'm retiring for family reasons', the usual cop-out of the useless when found out. He hasn't suggested retirement, he won't want to, but the Mandelbrot is an insidious creature. The Gorgon is nowhere near as smart as the Mandelbrot, so the Mandelbrot can get him to say things he wouldn't normally say. Subtleties of speech that would be lost on the Gorgon but which could prove very useful later. The Gorgon, of course, still thinks he is the best man-shaped thing for the job. Has anyone heard him define what the 'job' is? Could it be the job of crushing the UK and cutting it into bite-size pieces for easy consumption in the foetid maw of the EU? The Mandelbrot certainly insists on making us join the Euro, which would then make it extremely difficult to get out. If we left after we are Euroised, we would immediately have a worthless currency in circulation.

Still the Gorgon blusters on. He insists he knew nothing of the Corpse McBride's activities, despite being his boss.

"I didn't know that. I didn't know that. It's not what I do. Anyway, I don't text. But when that behaviour was discovered: out! Gone! Away! No longer working for me. And I think if you look at the people who work in our office ... it's people who've come from charities, academic life, business ..."

Indeed. People from charities funded by government, using money from taxpayers to pay people to tell the taxpayers how to live. People from business. In fact, people who nobody voted for run the day to day business of the country. The Maleficent Seven have cabinet posts without troubling us with any of that democracy stuff. Are we to believe they work in our interests? Why would they? It's not as if we asked them to, and they need fear no election reprisals. Then he admits he has no idea what they're up to. Yet he tells us this as though we should be pleased to hear it. This man is so far off the planet he can no longer see the sun.

A speech full of lies and spin, with a subtle hint that he might not want to do it any more. Who wrote that for him? The Mandelbrot is certainly complex enough to do it. Most of Labour know they have no chance at all in the next election if the Gorgon still runs the show. The sensible ones know that the damage runs deeper than the Gorgon himself, and while they cannot be the victors in the next election, they might be able to staunch the wound enough to at least survive it. To do that, they must excise the abscess burrowing into their flesh. He won't excise himself. Nobody will excise him for them. We're all enjoying the implosion too much to step in.

Big things are afoot, methinks, and the Gorgon is being manipulated into a position he cannot escape. He will refuse to move even when checkmate is called so it won't be a simple game. It will take a subtle and devious hand to maneouvre him into the right place. A delicate and detailed mind, as delicate and detailed as the real Mandelbrot set, also generated using imaginary numbers. Lord Mandelbrot, in his Cloak of Many Titles, is likely to be behind it but I doubt we'll even see his hands move. He's that good.

There are those who think the Gorgon cannot be manipulated. He is more single-minded and stubborn than a whole field of mules. Nobody could make him do anything he won't want to do. Push him, he will not move. He is the Iron Chancellor, perhaps better known as the Tin Man who begged Oz to give him a heart. Oz has now done so, but it comes at a price. The Gorgon is not being pushed or forced. He is being guided. When the time comes, the Gorgon will believe his resignation was his own idea. For the cheeldren.

Where manipulation is concerned, the Gorgon seems to be something of a soft touch. All it takes is a set of big teeth and a salesman's smile.

Where the rest of the population are concerned, he's still as heartless as the tin man. And always will be.


jpe bloggs said...

Has this got anything to do with BBC Radio 2 News telling me every hour yesterday that Brown was " hurt " by the personal nature of attacks on him during the recent attampts to oust him ?
Trying for the 'sympathy' vote perhaps, won't work mate.

Anonymous said...

Would you be so kind as not to use the word "spin" same as in spin doctor why not call it lies which it is?

Call me Infidel said...

Fondleson won't allow Broon to give up his day job until the Lisbon Treaty is a fait accompli. After that he will discard him like a used condom.

Rab C. Nesbitt said...

He's paving the way for his exit.

Barking Spider said...

Could be worse - he could be paving Mandelbum's exit!

Anonymous said...

Brown has recently changed spin meisters no doubt at Mandlebums suggestion. His new line of spin seems to be "well I don't really want to do all this PM stuff but I guess I will have to. It's my duty to the nation etc." The idea is to give the immpression that he is being something of a martyr who is sacrificing himslf for our benefit. What a complete, lying nauseating twat.

Dick the Prick said...

He's still a fucking cunt

Phil McVile said...

I've noticed the BBC trying to gain sympathy for Brown. As if he deserves it after what he's done. Fucking up the economy and the general incompetence I could forgive, but when I think of all the spiteful and repressive laws he's helped pass, the curtailment of civil liberties, the repression of freedom of speech etc etc then he deserves only contempt, along with his corrupt bunch of political henchmen, his fucking awful Police Force and his army of jobsworths who enforce his poisonous laws and regulations. Fuck the lot of them.

Fausty said...

An exceptional, perceptive piece, OH.

Fausty said...

... erm, I mean Leg-Iron.

Anonymous said...

Excellent post Leg-Iron. You have hit the nail on the head exactly. Very smoothly done - Brown the fucking deluded cunt sells us completely down the river into the coils of the EU - then resigns 'for the cheeldren' - no doubt naming that fucking cunt Mandelsnake as his 'successor'. Mandelsnake slithers into position as PM & says with a helpful & lying smile that he understands exactly how we all feel, he's not that keen on the EU himself personally - however, Gordon has brought us to where we are & there's nothing he can do about it - though of course he'd like to... How can Broon be so fucking THICK that he doesn't realise he's being set up?

Anonymous said...

he is a jock how thick do you want? genetically they are all skirt wearing ginger wife beating alcoholics and they live on the worlds biggest council estate.

ooresoce said...

"Big things are afoot, methinks, and the Gorgon is being manipulated into a position he cannot escape. He will refuse to move even when checkmate is called so it won't be a simple game."

"Push him, he will not move. He is the Iron Chancellor, perhaps better known as the Tin Man who begged Oz to give him a heart. Oz has now done so, but it comes at a price."

The Tin Man always had a heart he did not need the wizard to give him one.

Brown still has his finger on the button - Mutually Assured Destruction of the Mandelbrot by calling an erection. Brown is the child who if he doesn't get his own way, will go out of his way to spoil things for everyone else.

Mandelbrot is walking a tightrope here. He's been given plenty of control. His vanity will make him overstep the mark (and already has with regards to our adoption of the Euro). How many strikes does he get? Only the Brown man knows.

Dave H said...

The sodding demented bastard's managed to hijack an episode of Songs of Praise. Is this even legal?

Leg-iron said...

Anon 4:25 said: Would you be so kind as not to use the word "spin" same as in spin doctor why not call it lies which it is?

I sit corrected. The whole point of spin is that it's not actually lies, but selecting which bits of the truth to use, taking them out of context and distorting their meaning.

The Gorgon isn't even bothering to do that any more. He's just lying.

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