Bless them, I was shocked to discover they have no legal rights at all.
Surprisingly, they live lives pretty much like the rest of us; they get married, they have sex, they have babies. Today we learn that some of them become Benefit Cheats in their old age.
The Government paid out £73 million in state benefits to dead people last year. The Department for Work and Pensions confirmed that it is trying to claw back some of the overpayments to almost 200,000 dead people.
But it admitted that £27 million of the money will never be recovered due to a lack of funds in the deceased's estate.
Now by virtue of all my research, I consider myself better qualified than the average person to tell you what cadavers can get up to - and I am confident that they cannot nip round to the local cash point.
If £73 million has been paid into their bank accounts, then £73 million is still sitting in their bank accounts - either that or 'someone' has helped to remove it. Whyfore then, is the Department of Dodgy Statistics telling us that £27 million can't be recovered? Is that £27 million in Scottish bank accounts? Is that the problem? Have Scottish Cadavers discovered a way to pop into Yates' Wine Lodge for a few quick Stella's on route to their next scam?
It wouldn't surprise me. We appear to have a Scottish Cadaver running the country at the moment - is there no end to their talents?
Photo courtesy of Mary Roach's Publishers.