Wednesday, 28 January 2009

Caligula falters.

My hand is blurry because of global vibrations that started in America because hardworking families have told me it's the right thing to do. If it was left to the Do-Nothing party we'd have no vibrations at all, and people might have to work for a living instead of relaxing while we give them all they want.

I was at the pub last night. Not a boozy night - I was playing darts, and too much booze means lousy (and very long) games. We spoke about the new EU rules on fishing, explained to a grandfather that all his grandchildren now had their details on a database that would soon be left on a train for anyone to find, we spoke about how many had just lost their jobs and about the local firms who are not taking on new staff, we spoke about the attempts to close down pubs by any and all means possible. We wondered how much longer we would be allowed to carry our darts in our pockets and noted that a lot of people seem to be buying a great deal of tinned food and bags of salt lately.

Nobody was very drunk, apart from a couple of guys who always seem to be drunk when they arrive, and a good night was had by all. The pub now has a shelter out the back for smokers, so I won't say the name because the Righteous will be round to declare it an 'enclosed public space' and slap a no-smoking sign on it.

We don't talk 'politics' as such because none of them are interested in who's running what. They are very interested in what's happening in their country and in their own lives. Very interested indeed, and they are well aware of who's doing that.

On the bar was a copy of the Daily Express. Unusual in itself, here it's usually the Sun or the Record (the Scottish version of the Mirror). It was folded in half so I could only see the top line of the banner headline.

It said 'Brown's'.

I thought 'What's he done now?' and turned the paper over to see the rest of the headline.

It said 'Lost His Marbles'.

I haven't read the Express before, so I went along to their website. It's one of the sensationalist ones, you have to pick the story out of the hype, but it's in there.

Yes, it was this story. The tale of the modern-day Caligula, a deranged leader whose own advisors are terrified to tell him that what he's doing is driving the people of this country into a rage not seen since the mid 1600's. They plot and they scheme behind the scenes, but they dare not attack their Emperor directly, in case he eats their children.

In a speech that risked a furious backlash, the Prime Minister said the recession was his opportunity to forge a new global financial system.

He believes it, you know. The world is in the palm of his hand, his to crush with clunking fist. He is the Saviour who will lead us all back into the wilderness, away from all that dastardly progess and sinful happiness, to a place where our carbon footprint will fade to nothing along with our history.

Astonishingly, Mr Brown even claimed to have predicted the current financial crisis 10 years ago.

He who controls the present controls the past. He who controls the past controls the future. I'm beginning to think we shouldn't have sent them the book. The gibbering idiot thinks it was a message from God.

The express follows up with this story.

Some Labour insiders fear Mr Brown’s strategy of comparing himself with President Obama is becoming an embarrassment. They are also warning that Mr Brown’s past claims to have vanquished “boom and bust” have now come back to haunt him.

Well, there are a few differences between the Gorgon and the President. One of the biggest is that the President was actually elected. I know, I know, we vote for parties here, not individual ministers, but we have an expectation that we will know who's going to be running the show when we vote for that party. Then again, we used to have an expectation that at least some of those manifesto commitments would be honoured. That's no longer the case either.

There have been Internet mutterings about the saggy-faced one's sanity for a long time. He acts as though he has no ministers. He acts as though he is in sole and total charge. His ministers are off making up petty laws of their own, his MPs pursue personal agendas and the Gorgon takes no apparent interest in any of it. He is busy setting up his New World Order and if that means a few million have to suffer so he can achieve his vision, that's just too bad. Well, Gorgon, it's certainly new. It's not worldwide though, most of the world is better off than us, including those countries that have already seen riots. As for 'order', I see little evidence of any of that in government now.

They want him to make a public apology for his mistakes in the past that contributed to lack of regulation of financial markets. Another minister said: “It’s as if we are in a lift. We don’t know if we are going down to the ground floor or to the basement or whether the entire lift shaft is empty and we are plunging to our doom.”

His own party think he should apologise! Come on, Labour, you know that's not going to happen. We ordinary people have known all along that he and his little Tribe of Chaos have never and will never listen to anyone. They regard us with contempt. We are beneath them, we are Proles and they are the New Aristocracy.

Labour backbenchers and party members and supporters... you're all Proles too. The Gorgon won't listen to you either. At the best, you'll get slightly less contemptuous treatment than the rest of us. While you're useful.

The Gorgon is now clearly and demonstrably insane. He thinks he rules the world. None of those around him dare question his magnificence, none dare stand up to him, none defy his supreme will. This is not the Labour Party, this is the Gordon Brown Show and he is the only one who matters.

Labour are likely to be pulverised in the next election (if there is one) and deservedly so. They have abandonded everything they stood for and allowed this lunatic and his cronies to run the country unchecked. They don't even deserve to be in opposition. So it seems likely that the Cameroids will take Government with a huge majority and be able to do just what the hell they please with no effective opposition. Just as Labour did when they destroyed Major's government. Like Blair, Cameron will enjoy almost absolute control.

And so it will all begin again.

We don't just need a new government. We need a new way to form a government.


Oldrightie said...

Goes on a bit but OK for all that. I liked the evocation of pub gatherings. These bastard Stalinists really have sought the destruction of pub meeting places. People chat and ask questions. Can't have that, can we?

Dick the Prick said...

Spot on Leg Iron. MP's used to have integrity also. This type of recession is gonna keep happening with everyone blaming everyone else. No one gives a fuck anymore.

OT - not paranoid or owt but every time I come to this site, I get the 1 click sound you get always but the 2 more for no apparent reason - odd.

Anonymous said...

Lets hope Gordon promotes a horse to the cabinet, fucks his sister and then eats the unborn child,

But he wont, he's got no style

anonemo said...

I know where these hoons come from. Do not click this link if you are of a nervous disposition\in a PC enviroment.

Sue said...

It's very bloody scary.. I'm still in touch with loads of my friends in the UK and everyone is thinking the same thing.

He's'definitely lost it. Caligula, Nero and Hitler, all rolled into one.

it's either banned or compulsory said...

If he predicted this mess 10 years ago why did he not spend the last decade doing things to prevent it?
Was this all part of his mad master plan to despoil the economy and usher in the New World Order ( oops, sorry, Global ) just in time for Mandelson to drag us screaming for mercy into the euro ?

One snag though, since Gordon is clearly derranged and likely to be sectioned soon and given that Mandelson is the only person in Government with any brains ( however malevolently he chooses to use them ) he will not be able to take over as interim PM since he is now in the House Of Lords; mind you, that is merely a convention, not a law.

Mandy, New Lord Protector Of England governing via EU funded unelected Regional Development Agencies.
He could even afford to give us elections for our pretend Parliament; to expand your analogy, he could appoint a horse to Cabinet in the same way that Caligula did to the Senate, not out of insanity but to show his contempt for that body.

Guthrum said...

We need less Government, and what government there is should be as close to the people as possible, at County level. Reduce Parliament to 100 MPs with a remit to deal only with Defence and Foreign affairs.

Before we do any of this a written Consitution to guarantee our Liberty.

Gareth said...

If he predicted this mess 10 years ago why did he not spend the last decade doing things to prevent it?

He was a Do Nothing Chancellor!

I'm beginning to think we've had a decade long depression without anyone admitting it. Freeing up the credit markets was chosen as the means to combant it but it went too far and it's blown up in our faces.

K. McEgan. said...

The G8 meeting in London in April is an ideal opportunity to deal with the corrupt judiciary and plod

Anonymous said...

"The G8 meeting in London in April is an ideal opportunity to deal with the corrupt judiciary and plod"

No it isn't. Its an excuse for a load of posh kids wearing ski masks to shout some empty Left-wing nonsense about 'Facsists'(sic) and Globalisation. Twats.

K. McEgan. said...

Dear Anon,The best demos are the "Traffic light" ones.Green,peaceful,yellow=may be up for it,red=get yer own back on plod and the scum that have grinded the slaves underfoot.I AM SPARTACUS.

max the impaler said...

On the pub question..I haven't seen it mentioned anywhere but an awful lot of students used to depend on the pubs and restaurants to earn a few bob for hols and expenses etc.It's not there now,perhaps when they need it most.It's another balls up of epic proportions from the righteous.

Wyrdtimes said...

Damned good read.

Personally I favour direct democracy via a hermetically sealed open source voting system - time to lose the middle men.

Oh and home rule for England where we practice English law and only English law and spend English taxes only on England.

Tyburn Jig said...

Crooks who should dance the Tyburn Jig.

Anonymous said...

The fallout from this disaster is going to be a fucking sight to behold.

The main problem, however, is a lack of leadership. Anywhere. I could not think of one politician with backbone, much less an MP who I follow over the trenches.

It's this lack of leadership that really scares me.

stanislav, a young polish plumber said...

We don't just need a new government. We need a new way to form a government.

Yes, this is the important issue and it is dismaying that so many still cling to the dinosaurs of political party machines. the parties themselves are miniscule, more people read the Redditch Advertiser than are members of parties, utterly inconsequential, yet a few mad tories, snotty labourites and embittered libdemmies, bless, are able to control the elctoral process, to eliminate any other choices and fight among themselves over the spoils of Tyranny, fucking horrible bastards. The present disaster is often described as being redeemable by Cameron Rampant and his band of criminals, psychos and degenerates.

IYBAYCDWYW* but a debate needs to be promoted about how unallied but decent ordinary people, rather than career politicians can reclaim the legislature, is this the place for it ?

* pronounced I bay quid.

constitutionally averse to textese and abbreviation but this one seems apposite in these quarters - Its Your Blog And You Can Do What You Want.

Chalcedon said...

I think we should ask the army to come on home and stage a coup to save us all from this madman and his sycophants.

Anonymous said...

"in case he eats their children."

Very amusing metaphor.

Unfortunately, in economic terms El Gordo has already eaten everybody's children, and their grandchildren too.

We'll still be paying for his mistakes fifty years from now.

it's either banned or compulsory said...

Anonymous said "We'll still be paying for his mistakes fifty years from now"
No we won't; I don't have any Grandchildren, Yours will be.

Anonymous said...

even when cyclops is gone we will still have the eu pulling the strings and the same plot will continue.

i can see the army making a move and so can cycops, which is why he will extend their stay in afghanistan as well as push as many as he can into help police other conflicts as well, that way he can call a state of emergancy as well as getting assistance from euro police to help stop the rioting plebs.

people are the real assets, what the people deal in is debt.

just watch.

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