Friday, 19 December 2008

Let me go home!

Allah! Let me get the fuck out of here, innit!


An illegal immigrant who tried to flee Britain six times by stowing away on cargo ships leaving Avonmouth keeps getting caught and being made to stay.
Rashid Ali made the escape attempts by hiding in boats bound for his native Morocco over a period of more than four years.
After his fifth attempt to return home, Ali, 30, was held in a detention centre for three years at a cost to the taxpayer of £250,000.
But the Home Office still failed to repatriate him - and two days after being released he was nabbed hiding yet again on another boat.


Remarkable. Even an illegal raghead is spending YEARS trying to get off the doomed Titanic whilst our "masters" re-arrange the deckchairs.


I'm currently in Bristol and a fellow seditionary pointed this out for me. Kerry, you fat faced lezzer, if you fancy some tofu nibbles and non alcoholic nettle beer, we could discuss why this poor guy is not allowed to go home over lunch tomorrow. You useless, utterly useless twat. (Meet you in Cafe Maitreya at 10am)

28 comments:

Martin said...

I'd say enjoy Bristol, but that's like saying Enjoy Chinese Torture.

If I remember the only places that stop you from LEAVING are Communist countries with despot rulers.

So, yeah, Britain.

Leg-iron said...

His mistake, most likely, was that on a form somewhere he said he'd vote Labour.

After the election, they'll let him go home, but not before.

Rab C. Nesbitt said...

Fuck me! Even the illegal immigrants know this country is fucked! How incompetent is the government. Christ on a fucking bike.

Carter said...

This country is so fucked up even the illegal immigrants are fleeing. I feel sorry for the bloke ..... why can't we just let the poor bugger go home ??

it's either banned or compulsory said...

Government response is the usual shite
A UK Border Agency spokeswoman said she couldn't comment on individual cases.
Why not, we already know about it ?
"But she said: ( just to obfuscate, be pompous and totally the issue ). "The UK Border is among the toughest in the world, and we take seriously any attempt to evade our border controls". Ding dong merrily on high.

Followed by this childish statement "When we catch illegal immigrants we will often fingerprint them so they can never get back in." Ha bloody ha.

I love this from caring-sharing-touchy-feely plod "Keith Wood, Acting Chief Officer of The Port of Bristol Police, said:
"There are serious concerns about his safety because if he were to fall it is unlikely he could escape from the water and would probably drown". Makes me feel all Christmassy

The Alcohol Fuelled Frenzy is working just fine thanks Evette.

Biffo said...

Poor bugger, I know how he feels!I hope he gets home to Morocco, despite the machinations of ZaNuLab.

It really does say it for Labour though when even the illegals are trying to escape!

Anonymous said...

He wants to go home, I want him to go home I can see a solution here can anyone else?

Dick the Prick said...

There are ways to fuck up a normal person couldn't imagine.

The Beast Of Clerkenwell said...

Stupid cunt should have appealed to Lord Fondlethebums of boys
"MILORD,CAN YOU HELP ME WITH MY PASSAGE?"

Clunking Fist said...

"Many Eastern European ships' crews beat stowaways and are suspected of throwing many overboard."

So I am pleased to be able to announce that it's for his own good.

Want's to leave Brown's Britain does he? Obviously mentally deficient, thus the need for detention.

Mitch said...

They could have given him an Aston and a car ferry ticket and we all would have been happy.

The Last Of The Few said...

OH, Do me a favour and slightly off topic but when you meet the lovely Kerry for tea and muffins please get the chosen 1 to answer mt q's about Colour Sgt Dura's widow and family.
Bit of a close to home topic with me that one.
The young lady wont publish my questions or comments anymore.
I fel it may have accidentally just slipped her mind.

Ok back on topic.......just kick the dumb fuck out the country......we cant i forgot we would be violating his human rights by stopping him trying....Oh god

Ampers said...

Anonymous said..."He wants to go home, I want him to go home I can see a solution here can anyone else?"

This guy has more intelligence that the whole of the Labour voting public... we need people like this. Can't we put him on Mastermind or something. :-)

beness said...

poor bloke. Must be a nightmare trying to get back to your home having claimed asylum from it.

Not the first one though is he. How many criminals have been found back in the country they have fled?

The Penguin said...

Cor, Old Holborn, you really are a silver-tongued devil, aintcha?

I bet Kerry'll find your invitation irresistable, the stupid cow.

Hope you have a lovely lunch!

The Penguin

mad manc cunt said...

So he wants to get back to Morocco eh, ungrateful git? Throw him in the fuckin' sea and let him swim back. Put a seal suit on him too just in case he passes a bleedin' big shark!

fuchsia groan said...

Kerry, you fat faced lezzer, if you fancy some tofu nibbles and non alcoholic nettle beer, we could discuss why this poor guy is not allowed to go home over lunch tomorrow. You useless, utterly useless twat. (Meet you in Cafe Maitreya at 10am)


Ahh, is it possible to detect a teeny weeny trace of affection?

Dick Puddlecote said...

OH, If Kerry turns up, give her one for me ... a piece of your mind, that is.

wv. teate ?!?

The Refuser said...

"poor bloke. Must be a nightmare trying to get back to your home having claimed asylum from it."

Like all the Turks, Albanians, Iraqis, Somalis ad nauseum I used to encounter with their shiny new British passports containing immigration stamps from the countries where they claimed to have fled persecution.

I seem to recall this clown originally claimed to be Algerian as he thought there was a better chance of getting asylum. I would imagine there is more to the story than is being reported.

microdave said...

Isn't being kept here against his will an infringement of his human rights?

Gareth said...

This is less Orwell's 1984 and more Terry Gilliam's Brazil. A maddening, innefectual and laughable, bureaucratic mire.

These things make no sense. They exist for no reason. The only way out is a lobotomy.

Anonymous said...

This twat has entered the country illegally, surely he should have been fucked straight off back to Morocco as soon as possible. How much does a blow up dingy and an oar cost anyway ? If he survived the journey he may think twice about returning.

Word ver: bastsmep... Im sure theres a hidden message in that somewhere.

Bridge said...

You can almost imagine the fucking conference that Immigration managers must have had to decide what to do about this, all those conflicting boxes to tick and targets to meet. I wonder how high up the buck was passed before a decision was made?

Anyway, this Ali chap would be much better off getting an Easyjet flight out to Marrakesh - he'd easily sneak on amongst the beer-breathed Mancunian and Jockanese hordes without a passport. The check-in people would probably just be grateful he wasn't vomiting on them.

Still, should be a good deterrnet for any other would-be illegal immigrant. Few posters up around Calais saying 'Once you're in, there's no escape.' superimposed on a picture of Comrade Broon should do the trick.

Anonymous said...

So, OH, did she turn up or did she send some Fingermen?

Henry North London said...

Instead of spending taxpayers money on a court appearance why cant they just spend £100 quid on an easyjet to Casablanca?

Honestly some people are just screwed in the head

captcha wainkuqv

Tractor Stats said...

Gordon Brown was caught in the same trap, I'm voting for the Moroccan at the next election.

Rogerborg said...

Fezzhead, surely?

Chalcedon said...

Well OH, did Kerry the love of your life show up?

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