Monday, 8 December 2008

Festive Season 1

By request from the Beast of Clerkenwell, who once appeared sitting on Jimmy's hand


Cut out the middle man said...

The thought police will bw after me. I looked at the girls and they were naked in my mind :-)

Barnsley Bill said...

A new low, well done sir.
Old Holborn, plumbing new depths since the middle of 2008.

Calderdale said...

Play Partnership Manager
PO 2-5 £28,270 - £30,456 pa, 37 hpw (fixed-term 2 years)
NJC posts subject to Single Status Job Evaluation
Post Ref: ED479

Play Service Operations Manager
PO 2-5 £28,270 - £30,456 pa, 37 hpw
NJC posts subject to Single Status Job Evaluation
Post Ref: ED480

For both roles you will lead on taking forward and developing the Play Strategy in Calderdale, and will be very passionate about delivering positive outcomes for children, young people and their families. You will have extensive experience of multi agency partnership working and have an excellent understanding of play and play policy developments and problem solving skills.

Nancy's stout said...

The lovely old fella who used to cut my hair told a story of a Mr Saville on the cruise ships way back. It is said he (and please hold onto your supper) was rather keen on young ladies nibbling peanuts from all over his, ahem, naked body. Was almost part of his contract. Now then, now then. Anybody got any more revolting tales of Sir Jimmy's misdeeds?

mad manc cunt said...

Fuck me that is funny. Nearly pooing myself with laughter here. Wife said the words are sick. Soon as I stop laughing i'm divorcing the miserable cow!

black hole sunset said...

Great stuff!

O/T, but extremely relevent to recent spunkage postings and associated commentariata:

Louis Theroux: Law and Disorder in Johannesburg

Warning: may contain scenes of a shockingly worldview affirming nature.

wv: peddan (wtf?)

Rab C. Nesbitt said...

Bollocks! I aint got a clue what you lot are on about. My wee phone cant play media! (I use opera mini to read blogs cos i've got more chance getting a blow job from the missus than getting the fucking laptop from her!)

Rab C. Nesbitt said...

I see coronation street have a new scum family moving in. Timing is perfect! (I also can't get the remote from her)

man in the street said...

+++ Kerry McCarthy (Labour Member of Parliament for Bristol East) - UPDATE +++

No response.

wv: trabana - A cross between a Trabant and a banana - Communism with a caring, sharing ZaNuLab PF 'flavour'.

Mitch said...

How about we all send cans of whitewash to our MPs? they must be running out by now.

Old Holborn said...

Black hole, I watched last night.


That is what happens when a western society collapses

Anonymous said...

Some people will sit on anything for a thrill...

Calfy said...

Nancy's stout, I do.
Jimmy Saville only takes one pair on underpants whenever he goes on holiday/away from home etc. He washes them by hand and leaves them to dry overnight. Despite having been able to afford to buy a new pair every day.

Dave Lee Tranny said...

Why peanuts? I remember seeing the Louis Theroux thing about him and he really is odd - I thought sex pest odd but I guess whores don't complain much.

Anonymous said...

off topic alert:

more feral shits.


Sir Henry Morgan said...

OT but ...

"The council was forced to admit earlier this month that it had spent £19,000 on media training for high-profile employees involved in the Baby P case. "

black hole sunset said...

OH: "That is what happens when a western society collapses"

Too true, the dowry is gradually being squandered. It's also interesting to see how a large influx of unemployable, crime disposed migrants is having a significant negative impact on the situation. Overpopulation brings out the worst in anyone. There's a lesson in there for sure but I doubt it'll be given any thought by our power-crazed junta, maybe it's what they want (a grim interpretation, but it fits the facts too well to be discounted. It would also mean they're vindictive, malignant fleabags)

South Africa's brain drain dilemma

"South Africa, like many other developing countries, especially English-speaking nations, faces an enormous drain of human resources, attracted out of the country by favourable exchange rates, and different social environments."

".. and different social environments." You've got to smile. Do the Beeb actually think they're achieving anything by their euphemism laden coverage other than making a mockery of themselves? Maybe we'll enter some kind of post-PR era in a few years where it's become widely recognised that "perception managment" is an attack on the very people it claims to be helping. (you've got a see the true nature and scale of a problem to have any chance of correcting it)

Anon: "off topic alert:"

Holy shit, what next....

Major General Pocklington Penis said...

Sir Henry - why Sir, could have a decent nose-bag for that - dashed disgraceful coves.

Rogerborg said...

Those Johannesburg slum pits look like a slightly upmarket version of Glasgow's East End. You'd never get an ambulance in only 2 hours though.

the breast of clerkenwell said...

"Lissen up guys and lasses, Clunk Click Every Trip ", nanny state gone mad.

it's either banned or compulsory said...

black hole sunset
Louis Theroux: Law and Disorder in Johannesburg
Great link, stopped playing after 15 minutes but I got the drift. What a soppy twat that Theroux is, just looking at his glasses made me want to slap him.

" Ooh err, are they rubber bullets ? "
" Are any of these guys drugs dealers ? OMG !! "
" Jesus Christ, he's just firing on those fellows... "

Who needs Mad Max when they have the real thing.

Goodnight Vienna said...

Here's one for you OH

He rammed into a Punto, killing father and son.

lilith said...

Louis Theroux is hot

Tuscan Tony said...

He was an old mate of my daddy's (they worked together at Radio Luxembourg in the 60s); he sent flowers to me when I was born, which knowing now what I do know is very, very disturbing.

Anonymous said...

whats with all the gang-raping immigrants this week

fuckers. kill the lot of them

word verif: diess (appropiriate!)

Cassius said...

Old Holborn .. I want to send you a mail.


Old Holborn said...

Anonymous said...

South Africa, like many other developing countries, especially English-speaking nations, faces an enormous drain of human resources, attracted out of the country by favourable exchange rates, and different social environments."

They mean white flight of course. Pravda is self parodying.

The Beast Of Clerkenwell said...

Actualy it was his cock I was sitting on.
Being serious, Its well known that Sir Jim is a necrophile, that's why he works as a hospital porter.

woman on a raft said...

@ Nancy's Stout. It is interesting to note that there are some people who are not named by convention. Presumably this is so that bots find it harder to pick up references on regular sweeps.

woman on a raft said...

"It was also entirely fictional."
See paragraph 10 from the end: "The emergence of the internet by 1998 posed a problem for the show in the coming 12 months".

black hole sunset said...

it's either banned or compulsory : "What a soppy twat that Theroux is,."

It is a very grating and annoying style but I think he's trying to be purposefully non-threatening and naive to elicit explanations from his subjects. It's plain for all to see what's going on and what it means but he does get them to put it in their own words (often producing much important detail). I'd have surely been killed if I'd have tried to do half the stuff that he has =)

At least he's prepared to do the subject matter some justice so all credit to him (unlike the beeb etc). If you've got the stomach for it, there is also this (the previous episode to the SA one and a very interesting comparison - prepare to enter a surprise free "melting pot"):

Louis Theroux: Law and Disorder in Philadelphia

"Who needs Mad Max when they have the real thing.

Coming soon to an idyllic English town near us all.

wv: gadstab (seriously)

gad : verb (used without object) to move restlessly or aimlessly from one place to another.

black hole sunset said...

Anonymous : "whats with all the gang-raping immigrants this week"

It stretches imagination beyond breaking to comprehend the state of the minds involved in something like that - it's below animal.

Once convicted, and all appeals heard, they should have their hands and feet amputated (under proper surgical conditions - no point sinking to their level) and then be deported outside the UK - and I mean anywhere at all that will take then for a fee (there are some pretty poor countries around the world who would be happy to get a few grand per head, no questions asked).

Sod all that "country of origin" crap. If there's somewhere they'd prefer to go that will have them (for the same fee) then fair enough, otherwise just pick randomly from a list of available locations and book a charter flight. Goodbye and good riddance.

Mr T said...

Regarding the gang-raping immigrants to which anon 9:50 referred, we used to have a fine legal tradition in this country called being hung, drawn and quartered. Time to revive it, methinks.

As an aside I've no recollection of hearing about these cases on Al Beeb. Even the Telegraph, which was a decent enough rag when Conrad owned it, seemed to have overlooked them. Sic transit gloria Telegraph :-(

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