Thursday, 25 September 2008

Another slice of Freedom gone

Slices of MY freedom being shaved off, every single fucking day

Refering back to Leg Irons post on Who will Save Us? Perhaps we should have a look at the slices of liberty that are gently being shaved away from our freedom by the crazy 646. We have had over 3000 new laws introduced by them as they seek to regulate and monitor, prosecute and ostracise the individual. I tried to sell a grey squirrel today but that has been made illegal. Did you also know that householders who fail to nominate a neighbour to turn off their alarm while they are away from home can be breaking the law? One new law a day under New Labour.

Today, ID cards for foreigners were released. A soft push to get the rest of us to accept our cattle tags, they start on language students first, then the rest of us by 2017. If I was a student, I would tell the immigration officer (yes, they must meet) to shove his card up his fucking arse.

This is not Britain. This is East Germany without the discipline or the Leica cameras. When is it going to stop? When are the 646 going to be happy that they have legislated enough? When are they going to stand back and say “right, that’s that sorted then. Everyone is safe/secure/compliant”?

Just as the hippies and lentil munchers wrecked havoc on society during the sixties and seventies with their social experiments, vile experiments that led to sink estates and the Guardian, ghettos and ganglands and school leavers who can hit the teacher but can’t read or write, we now have a new 646, full of lawyers who know of nothing other than how to legislate. Hence the one new law a day.

I would like a parliament of individuals. Independents, elected on what they said they would do, not some diktat from the Politburo. I would like to see Party Whips, well, whipped. Through the fucking streets. I would like to see real democracy. Other countries have it (Switzerland for example) and they are never involved in pointless wars. They never have to hide their faces from 14 million CCTV cameras, or have their iris and fingerprints scanned onto an exit visa, like we do. Their central bank doesn’t have to print off more money to send to unemployed black men in string vests. They just on quietly with the job of living a full life. They don’t have to pay a fee to be force fed the daily party line through the State Broadcaster. They don’t have councils that can send any Tom, Dick or Ahmed into your house at will.

Yes, I could just fuck off, by why should I? I’ve paid my taxes, kept my nose clean and worked hard. Yet those grasping 646 just will not leave me alone.


So, I’ve decided that if they are going to take away any more of my freedoms, I am going to object. And I am going to use the law to do it. After my walk on November 5th (just as Prime Mentalists Question Time finishes by the way), I am going to start using some very weird and wonderful laws to cause maximum disruption to the State that is stamping on my face. I am going to invoke every common law I can find (bet you wearing a mask in public will be illegal by 7th November by the way). So, if I can find that I have the right to drive cattle through the city of London on Good Friday, I will. If there is a law that says I can harvest gooseberries from Admiralty Land, I am going to invoke it. If there is a common law that says that I, as a commoner, can catch Salmon from Lambeth Palace on Easter Monday, I am going to do just that – with dynamite.

Most of all, I am looking for a law that says I can throw Politicians from the top of big ben.

Ladies, Gentlemen, Transgenders. Your mission. Go forth and find byelaws. Find ancient rights of commoners. The more ridiculous the better. I am going to be busy being a right, royal pain in the fucking arse to the State next year. When they stop introducing new laws, I will stop fucking them with the old ones. I don't care what they do to me anymore. They fuck with me, I'll fuck with them



Dungeekin said...


Nowt more to be said.

Fuck 'em all.....and see you on the 5th.


Mark Wadsworth said...

It's a nice idea, but if we all did this, they'll suddenly find a way to repeal all the old laws.

Snowolf said...

Interesting you should mention immigration officers:

I would appear to have the day off on the 5th of Nov. I might need to pop up to town to get some of the excellent whisky marmalade from Selfridges foodhall. Is there anything else going on?

Old Holborn said...

I intend to be in the pub by 2pm, necking large amounts of Margaux, after that, I may travel to Lewes fo the annual riots (google:Bonfire Cliffe) or join Tuscan Tony who is having a Harry Potter book burning festival in Sussex.

Most likely, I'll be sitting in Bow Street nick refusing to tell them who I am for 8 hours.

no longer anonymous said...

Isn't there some ancient law that allows you to shoot a Welshmam with a crossbow in a certain town on a particular day of the year?

Anonymous said...

"Isn't there some ancient law that allows you to shoot a Welshmam with a crossbow in a certain town on a particular day of the year?"

Shame it's not a fucking scotsman.

Might well see you on 5th Nov, I seem to have the day off somehow...


Old Holborn said...

It is lawful to kill a Scotsman in York if he is carrying a bow and arrow.
It is illegal for taxi drivers to carry rabid dogs or corpses.
A taxi driver must ask passengers if they are suffering from plague or smallpox.
A member of the House of Commons is not allowed to resign his seat. However, if one wants to leave the post, he applies for (and is automatically granted) the Stewardship of the Aylesbury Hundred, which is a job with no duties or pay but which makes him ineligible for membership of Parliament.
Anyone entering the Houses of Parliament while wearing a suit of armour is liable to be arrested.
It is illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament (I'm not sure what punishment is inflicted on offenders).
Any whale washed up on the shore is the property of the Queen, so she can use its bones for her corset.
In Hereford you can shoot a Welsh person on a Sunday, with a longbow, in the Cathedral Close.
You can shoot a Welsh person with a bow and arrow in Chester, inside the city walls and after midnight.
It is legal for a male to urinate in public, as long it is on the rear wheel of his motor vehicle and his right hand is on the vehicle.
Women are permitted to go topless in Liverpool provided they work as a clerk in a shop selling tropical fish.
A bed may not be hung out of a window.
It is illegal for a lady to eat chocolates on a public conveyance.
It is illegal to be drunk on licenced premises.
Any person found breaking a boiled egg at the sharp end may be sentenced to 24 hours in the stocks.
Any boy under the age of 10 may not see a naked mannequin.
It is illegal to eat mince pies on December 25.
In London it is illegal to hail a taxi while suffering from bubonic plague.
Sticking a postage stamp (showing the head of the queen, which they all do) on an envelope upside down is considered treason.
It is illegal to go within 100 yards of the queen when not wearing hose, socks or stockings.
It is illegal for any commoner's pet to have carnal knowledge of an animal belonging to the monarch.
A pregnant woman may relieve herself anywhere she likes, including (if she requests) in a policeman's helmet.
A hackney carriage (i.e. taxi) driver must (still) carry a bale of hay and a bucket to feed and water his horse

leg-iron said...

So, how do we get Gordon to visit York? I have a bow and arrow and it would be nice if he held it for a moment.

Anonymous said...

The father of a friend of mine is in the Worshipful Company of Apothecarys or some such antedeluvian guild and as one of the perks they have right to drive their sheep over Westminster Bridge or similar. If you know any of these old duffers it might be worth enquiring what similar rights they enjoy and if they are interested in exercising them.

Anonymous said...

Schoolboy stuff.

Start fucking fighting for something, something that the masses can buy in to, not against something and you might get some traction.

You've already said that if they stop with MORE laws you'll behave yourself. They've got passion and goals. Money and power. What have you got?

Elby The Beserk said...

Great stuff, but have to pull you on the hippie bollix. As a card-carrying ageing hippy from the 60s, I can tell you that no true hippy ever went into any government related job. No sirree.

Now, many who might call themselves hippies, who looked once at a spliff and knew someone who had seen a tab of acid, sure thing, they slimed everywhere.

But they weren't - ever - hippies. Just cunts. Call 'em what you want. but that wasn't hippies who fucked up society. No-one who has had a full on psychedelic experience is going to fuck about with shit like that. You'd better believe it, or I will have to dose you.

You want to check out the ur-Hippies, then read up on Kesey and the Pranksters, and on the Grateful Dead.

Test at 11

Anonymous said...

The will to pull the lever on the gibbet that's what I've got....

Anonymous said...

Sounds an awfully good idea OH. However I also agree with the person who suggested stsrting to fight for something. Perhaps a two-pronged attack? Any connection between York & Robin Hood? Just trying to think of a way to involve Pennywise the Clown in some sort of enactment. A Mystery Play or something that he comes to view?

Old Holborn said...


You'll have to try harder than that if you want a written terrorist death threat against our Glorious Leader from me.

You can meet me if you like on my Nov 5th walk. I'll leave it up to you to work out which one is the real OH.

Run along now, some Muslims are up to no good.

Lilith said...

A pregnant woman may relieve herself anywhere she likes, including (if she requests) in a policeman's helmet.

That is my all time favorite law ever.

Anonymous said...

How about pettioning Queeny I am sure we have a right to complain to her otherwise what use is she,just a thought,enough people maybe (wishful thinking),a few words to the country from her and all hell could let loose.

Revolution Harry said...

I would like a parliament of individuals. Independents, elected on what they said they would do, not some diktat from the Politburo.

I can't agree with you more.

Other countries have it (Switzerland for example) and they are never involved in pointless wars.

World War's One and Two were funded and manipulated by the European banking cartels (how else do you think Germany went from it's post World War 1 bankrupt and demoralised state to a war machine capable of taking on pretty much the rest of Europe) and there were powerful reasons why Switzerland remained 'neutral'.

Finally, Council on Foreign Relations insider Carroll Quigley warned us about this back in 1966 when he wrote:

The powers of financial capitalism had (a) far-reaching aim, nothing less than to create a world system of financial control in private hands able to dominate the political system of each country and the economy of the world as a whole. This system was to be controlled in a feudalist fashion by the central banks of the world acting in concert, by secret agreements arrived at in frequent meetings and conferences. The apex of the systems was to be the Bank for International Settlements in Basel, Switzerland, a private bank owned and controlled by the world’s central banks which were themselves private corporations. Each central bank… sought to dominate its government by its ability to control Treasury loans, to manipulate foreign exchanges, to influence the level of economic activity in the country, and to influence cooperative politicians by subsequent economic rewards in the business world.


I'm not sure I can make it on November 5th but if you ever decide to herd sheep over Westminster Bridge I'm on the next train.

Elby the Beserk said...

Nope, the weirdos you want are all the mad leftie politico groups - the IMG, the IS (the BBC, the CIA, Matt Busby), etc. etc. Now around in such forms as The Revolutionary Communist Tendency, The Tendency to Revolve Communitarianly, and other such orgs.

Anyway. All these cunts ended up as council workers, social workers, meddlers, politicos. Now they are having their two-happorth. We need to deal with them.

The IMG in Oxford used to go and picket at various strikes in the area (car workers, didcot) and get completely ignored by the striking (real) workforce). Christ they were tedious.

By the way, wrt to Ken Kesey and the Pranksters - never trust a prankster.

Finally! Thanks for kind words and offers of help on L's blog. L Junior an unexpected bonus of running into L four years ago or so. She's a fine young woman and this is a fucking disgrace.

But don't blame the hippies!

Old Holborn said...

Elby, you Hippy.

Could you recommend a lentil munching, sandal wearing, Grateful Dead listening QC to sort out L Juniors issue?

Or would you rather she dealt with a professional?

After all, it could affect her whole life.

Your call

Billy Wallace said...

You can’t beat the system, so we’re fucked,

There is the old saying, “if you can’t beat um join um,”

So how do you get the rest of the country that don’t vote, to vote with a big fuckoff.

Old Holborn said...


Ghandi, Mandela, Gorbachov, Walesa, Luther King, Dalai Lama?

Did they beat the system?

You don't need a vote to overthrow empires. You just need a perspective.

Anonymous said...

At least opt out of THEIR system...

Bex said...

You know that's not a bad idea Old Holborn, myself and a friend will enjoy 2009 alot more now me think's >:)
*runs off to plot and read-up on the old bylaws and what not*

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