Tuesday, 19 August 2008

EVERYTHING finally made illegal

After 11 years of rule, a massive three thousand new laws, one a day in fact, New Labour have finally made everything illegal. I discovered this today as I tried to sell a grey squirrel. That is now illegal.

So, on the assumption that everything is now illegal, we must all be criminals. This, at least, explains why we have 14 million CCTV cameras watching us all day. It also explains why half the population acts like hardened old lags when barging to the front of the queue to pick up their weekly snout allowance and the other half are lawyers.

If I am going to be treated as a criminal, I am going to act like one. You have been warned.


electro-kevin said...

I said on Bubble's blog that I would break the law and drive uninsured, unregistered, untaxed, unlicensed ... if the Government continued in its policy of curtailing my fundamental right to movement.

There is a serious risk that in trying to enforce many many new laws we will obey none of them.

leg-iron said...

True. It's no longer possible to be a law-abiding citizen so there's no point in trying. if you see someone getting a kicking and you try to stop it, you get arrested for assault. Might as well just whack them both by a two-by-four and be done with it.

Might as well do it before they start fighting too. It'll save time later.

Lilith said...

Gordon Brown still hasn't outlawed the hand made chocolate stall at the farmers market....shhh, don't tell him about it...

Master D'bater said...

So long as they don't make wanking illegal I'll be fine!

Bobsheadrevisited said...
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