Tuesday, 15 July 2008

Lenny Henry

Lenny yesterday

What the fuck is it with the English? In a galaxy far, far away, a long, long time ago, Lenny Henry made old people who lived in council houses and were scared of "darkies" laugh at a very, very bad impersonation of Frank Spencer.
OK, point 1 on his CV.
Well done.
From that moment onwards, he has been adopted by the BBC/Pravda as their own personal golliwog. Not a season passes without his stupid grinning face appearing in some politically correct shite either in some crap sit com aimed at the four black families who are actually at home eating thier tea, based around what his dad told him the UK was like when they got of the Windrush or gurning his way through Children in Need. In need of a fucking break from gormless fucktards like you, you cunt.
Recently, the BBC/Pravda funded a radio show of his called "Lenny Henry, totally unsuited for anything other than being married to the fat, unfunny one out of French and Saunders, pretends to give a shit about Bob Dylan". I can just see the luvvies over at White City creaming their knickers over the Islington Cliterrati points they'll score from that. A black man (gasp) doing Bob Dylan (gasp). Fact: Henry was so far out of his depth, a bathosphere wouldn't find him. Didn't stop him making pick of the week though.
We have also had some shite "comedy" on my favourite Radio 4 slot whereby he pretends to be the son of a Reggae Record shop owner. How fucking patronising is that? He did the same in some TV sitcom during the '80's featuring him as a barber with an entire black cast and that bombed bigger than Nagasaki.
Lenny. We know you are a useless unfunny cunt. We know you have bills to pay. But for the love of fucking Jesus and your own body stop bending over and taking it up the arse from the BBC in return for pieces of silver. You are doing NOBODY any favours. Not us, not blacks and not the BBC.
So fucking stop it. Get a proper job.
Ainsley, you're next.....
Lenny's stunning career can be found here
And here is his media manifesto (from his website)
Title card: Len's List:
1. When you're commissioning your programmes ...put diversity on the agenda. Write it in there so it doesn't get forgotten.
2. Reach out to schools and colleges and make people aware that ethnic minorities are welcome in the UK TV Industry - get in on the ground floor otherwise these people are not going to be able to contribute to our industry.
3. Set targets. You know who I'm talking about. If you don't set targets, you're gonna have an empty plate up here. I don't want anyone to end up with two cheesy balls and a pepperami ...set targets ...do it tomorrow.
4. Create internships to give people without the benefit of an Oxbridge education the chance to participate in programme making. I'm talking mentoring, apprenticeships the full works.
5. When you're looking for people to put in front of the cameras ... why don't you try going off the beaten track a little bit? You might just find... someone like me.
6.You commercial guys ...start thinking of ethnic minorities as an untapped market. They're the audience of the future; they're consumers just like everybody else, start going for that diversity pound.
7.and you might not be able to do this tomorrow ...unless you're Mark Thompson or Michael Grade ...but... Start appointing ethnic minority staff. None of this changes ...unless you appoint staff. Len


killemallletgodsortemout said...

You, me old mucker, are spot on. I remember seeing Lenny Henry when I first saw him on the box. He was a gangly kid - he wasn't funny then, hasn't been funny during his career, and will NEVER be funny.
There are several other unfunny fuckers of his ilk - notably Jonathan Ross, and Ben Elton.

But twat Henry is in my humble opinion an utter, utter cunt of the highest order.

Bobsheadrevisited said...

I had a dream once where I beat Lenny Henry to death with a brick. It took ages.
When I woke up I felt so relaxed and at peace with myself that it felt like I'd had some sort of deep, spiritual experience. It always cheers me up to think of it.

Obnoxio The Clown said...

5. When you're looking for people to put in front of the cameras ... why don't you try going off the beaten track a little bit? You might just find... someone like me.

What, another boring, untalented, unfunny twat who trades on his ethnicity? Fucking great idea!

Barnsley Bill said...

It went downhill after his appearance on opportunity knocks.
he has just been interviewed in NZ and told them he would like to bring his family to NZ and retire!
Not on my watch you talentless fat fuck. it was bad enough having barrymore down here for a couple of years attending the opening of envelopes without lenny and his salad dodging wife as well

ranter said...

I feel at home here!

Old Holborn said...

Don't go putting your dirty fucking feet on the sofa.

Antipholus Papps said...

Conspicuously absent from that list is:

8. Be funny. Write some funny jokes, and deliver them in a style that will make the audience laugh.

Oh, and Lenny... I'm not a fucking consumer, I'm a free man!

Chilean said...

I'm worried for his little duck he carries around

Anonymous said...

He's less funny than an autopsy, as is his grinning, talentless jackanape of a wife, Dawn "I don't know if you've ever noticed, but I'm fat and it's fucking hilarious" French (as in 'letter').

Lenny Henry should be shot, stabbed, poisoned, stabbed again, hung, drowned and then asked to leave the country.

He's as entertaining as the shadow of a leper on a set of gallows.

Anonymous said...

I reached this website by Typing Lenny Henry Wanker into Google....nuff said.

Anonymous said...

Good Shout Old Holburn,

Cunt's all over the place for Comic Relief.

It ain't Comic or a Relief to see him spouting his shite yet again.

Anonymous said...

I come from Dudley and knew the ass when he had fuck all to do except scrounge chips off kids in Kates Hill.Where do YOU go to my lovely...You were not funny then and you aint funny now you self obsessed big headed twat!!!!

Templar Knight said...

I find Lenny Henry about as funny as finding out I have cancer.

It fills my heart with joy knowing so many others feel the same that this useless twat was given air time on TV to spout his fuck arse unfunny jokes.

Just for ref, once they find Lenny Henrys cold corpse in a standard spunk/piss stained bedroom at a Premier Inn, I might consider booking with them again.

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